M-I-C-K-E-Why Does God Let This Happen?

The Happiest Place on Earth just got a little sadder. The New York Times reports that two monorails collided at the Magic Kingdom of Disney World, killing one of the train operators.

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It was the first fatal crash in the monorail's 38 years of hauling screaming children to 2-minute rides with 4-hour lines.

That fact surprises me considering they will make anyone a monorail conductor. I was four years old and had no monorail training when Mickey gave me a monorail conductor's license.

Said Goofy, "This is the worst accident since someone thought it would be funny to put a real giant squid in the 20,000 Leages Under the Sea ride."

Donald Duck also commented on the accident, but who can tell what the hell he's saying?