Really Science? Really?

Scientists have created human sperm in a laboratory for the first time, according to BBC. The scientists took some embryos, derived stem cells, encouraged growth... blah blah blah, meiosis... blah blah blah, sperm took four to six weeks to grow.

Again scientists have shown the virtually limitless possibilities of useless crap that science is capable of. It only took four to six weeks to grow what takes any guy five minutes with a sock and the lingerie section of the Sears catalogue to make.

Also, isn't destroying an embryo to create sperm kinda like making a ham sandwich, licking off the mayonnaise, and throwing the rest away? It just seems like we're moving backwards. If all you want is the mayonnaise, why bother to make the sandwich?

Need I quote Jeff Goldblum again?

You Know What Would Make Great White Sharks Scarier?

They're big, fast, have rows of sharp teeth, and eat people. The only problem? They aren't scary enough.

Science to the rescue! Studiers of Great White Shark behavior have compared the hunting techniques of the vicious fish to those of human serial killers. Oh, science.

The sharks stalk their prey from out of sight, often returning to the same places to find their next kill and learning from past attempts.

An entire series of Jaws movies wasn't enough to keep people out of the ocean. We needed to group the animal with the likes of Jeffrey Dahmer, Ed Gein, and John Wayne Gacy.

In the wise words of the sagely Jeff Goldblum, "Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."

If only we all stopped to listen to the wisdom of Jeff Goldblum...